Archive for the ‘Religion’ Category

I Weep for the Future

Wednesday, January 21st, 2009

My mother’s husband’s children don’t know who our current primeminister is. They’re all in their teens. I’d blame the school system, but I know it’s most likely their parents’ fault.

PARENTING PROTIP: Old people, if you create a generation of slobbering ignorami, I’m getting the  “Murder She Wrote” reruns taken off the air.

Well, that’s not really a tip so much as a threat.

My Fursona

Monday, October 20th, 2008

Species: Romerolagus Diazi

Name: Feleesha Moonflower VII

Age: 1738 (that’s combining all the lives I’ve lived)

Sex: mostly female ;) .

Sexual Orientation: ambiguous

Spouse: Mr. Dr. M.G. Dillingham (ESQ.) (a new-souled albatross)

Soultwin: Andrea Cottontail Foxtrot (an old-souled pygmy marmoset)

Slave: Griffinderp Fallowtoe (a little bitch ;) )

Mortal Enemy: Emo Phillips

Favourite Drink: orange kool-aid and whiskey

Favourite Movie: Sonic OVA

Weakness: bottled moonlight

Powerword: Spatula! (LOL)

Favourite Colour: aubergine

Good Deeds Until I Earn My Wings: 47

Religion: Therianthropy

Magic Item: The wind sphere of Atillion

Speeds on my bicycle: 10

Homeland: The rolling plains of Neryvis Meadow

Hobby: Fighting off bad vibes from hairless apes

Organizations: PETA, Anthropomorphic Diversity Support Association, MADD, The Avian/Mammalian Alliance, Otherkin for Barack Obama 08, the Furistan Commando Force

Yiffually Transmitted Diseases: lycanthropy, FIV, monkeypox

Clothing: optional

Jedi Lightsaber Technique: Vaapad

Favourite Book Series: Animorphs

Secret Crush: Scooby-Doo

Fursuit Progress: 84% (I’m having trouble finding enough yak fur)

Weapon of Choice: the Thompson Persuader

Patron Diety: Ah-Muzen-Cab

Clan: Nakatomi

Guardian Angel: Timothy Treadwell

Favourite “Star Trek” race: the Gorns

A Crude, Yet Mystical Digging Tool

Saturday, May 24th, 2008

My local movie theatre is like the only one within a 300 mile radius, thus, at the best of times, it’s hard to get tickets and decent seats, but when a huge movie like Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull rolls in, it’s nigh-impossible, so I went to The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian instead.

The above would seem like a run-on sentence, but it’s not.


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Prince Caspian is about a bunch of kids defending a bunch of mystical animals from genocide by the Spanish. The kids do this because they think it’s what the great Jesus-lion would want them to do, but the Jesus-lion works in mysterious ways or something or other. It’s basically just kids and centaurs stabbing Spanish guys for two hours and this supposedly has something to do with Christianity. I am oversimplifying, of course, because I am an obtuse and unedifying individual. It’s how I roll. Deal with it.

Anyhoo, the religious message in Prince Caspian, like in The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe before it, is actually buried kind’ve deep. You pretty much have be aware of all the symbolism beforehand and look for it really hard, to notice anything. I very much doubt that your average kid, twelve or under, would notice it on their own. Which is why I am confused that the Religious Right (bum bum BUM), would think that massive box office intake of the Narnia movies means some sort victory for them. The movies, in my mind, are more likely to turn kids on to fantasy than to Jesus. And, as we all know, fantasy is the DEVIL!


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Also, WTF, the Jesus-lion, Aslan, calls upon Poseidon or Neptune (I think they’re the same guy), to do his dirty work. Unless, of course, the giant dude made out of water with the curly Greek beard represents archangel Michael or somesuch. Michael’s modus operandi was usually fire though. No, I’m pretty sure it was Poseidon. Dang movie is gonna turn your kids into a bunch of old-god worshipping hippies.

BTW, the moral of the movie seemed, at least to me, to be: “You can kill as many people as you want (especially Spaniards), as long as, in the end, you believe in Jesus.”  I hope I don’t have to explain what’s wrong with that, do I?

I must be getting old, because watching a bunch of children going to war and killing people, in this movie, actually kind’ve upset me. I blame having to do research about the Children’s Crusade and the Lord’s Resistance Army in High School.

I’m Going to Kill Fred Phelps and then Picket His Funeral

Wednesday, January 23rd, 2008

Heath Ledger has been dead now for less than a day and already the Westboro Baptist Church Fucks are planning on picketing his funeral. A stunt that will no doubt provide them with more media coverage than any of their previous crimes against humanity. And there will be Fred Phelps spouting hate and ignorance, all the while pretending that it’s about upholding God’s law or something, when it’s really about Fred feeding his ego.

Isn’t Pride a sin or something there, Phelps? I know Wrath is one and with the amount you go on about hating things, you definitely exhibit buckets full of Wrath and since getting absolved or rebaptised or whatever the fuck would involve you admitting you’d done something wrong, you’d never do it. By your on stupid religious laws you’re fucking doomed, bitch.

I’m not really sure what I’m going on about here. I guess I’m just pissed off that an actor that has brought lots of entertainment and joy into my life is gone and that some stupid bigoted asshole is going to try and fuck with the bereaved’s shit, just to get his ugly shit face on television again and the fucker will, regardless of whether picketing happens or not.

I’m also pissed off at myself. Until now, I’ve watched the antics of Fred Phelps with indifference. He was just a crazy guy doing crazy shit. It took some stupid shit involving a pretty-boy actor to get me incensed. I’m disappointed in myself for not caring about the little guys Fred’s been fucking with.

Sooooooo, anyway… You like being like Jesus there, Phelps my boy? I’ll make you a fucking martyr. You can even have your own cross to carry, if you want one. Only above yours the plaque will read “King of the Assholes”. On the third day, instead of of you rising from your grave, I’ll be pissing on it and the the world will be a fucking better place.

Well, that’s enough of me venting. I’ll probably regret this in the morning.

Here’s to the day when I have a calmer head that will prevail or whatever.

Life is Meaningless

Wednesday, June 27th, 2007

For something to have meaning there must be an intelligence behind whatever the thing is that decides what it is and what its purpose is.

Since life is merely the result of matter and energy coming together randomly in just the right combinations, at just the right time (a coincidence) and not the result of some god, life has no intelligence behind it and can’t have any meaning.

Some people would see not being born with a meaning as quite freeing. They can decide what the purpose of their life is for themselves, but ultimately whatever reason their life had will be lost when they die and all memory of their lives is lost.

Bloodlines die out, history books crumble to dust and eventually the universe itself will end due to entropy. Everybody’s accomplishments will be erased, so there can’t be any point in doing anything in the first place.

And that’s why I’m not getting my lazy ass off the couch for the rest of the summer.

Only 72?

Friday, May 4th, 2007

I’m thinking that if I was spending eternity in paradise, that I’d want more than just 72 virgins. I’d want an infinite amount of virgins.

Even if I got bored of virgins, I’d probably want to deflower another one every 1000 years or so, just for kicks.

Eventually though, I’d probably start wondering where all the virgins were coming from. I mean, only so many people that die are actually virgins. Maybe God creates new ones in Heaven just for the enjoyment of the righteous?