Laser Boredom
Monday, October 6th, 2008My feet are awesome!
Posts Tagged ‘boredom’
Herpes and other Deal Breakers
Sunday, January 20th, 2008Lately, I’ve been watching a lot of television (the outdoors is currently cold and unpleasant) and I’ve noticed a disturbing trend in the herpes medication commercials. Mainly, that there are so many couples featured in them.
I don’t know about you, but if I found out that my husband had herpes, he wouldn’t remain my husband for very much longer. In fact, I’d probably murder his sorry ass and I sure as Hell wouldn’t let him anywhere near my vagina ever again, even if he was taking Valtrex to control his outbreaks (ew ew ew fucking ew!)
Generally speaking, if you have periodic outbreaks of anything, I’m going to pitch you to the curve. Outbreaks are a deal breaker for me.
For example, I would be extremely displeased with periodic outbreaks of choreographed song and dance with the villagers. Those villagers must toil day and night in my mines and fields, if we are to achieved the quotas set forth by the Five Year Plan.
I AM NOT GOING TO HAVE STALIN MURDER MY ASS AGAIN!
That reminds me. Being Joseph Stalin is also a deal breaker for me.
I just really hate moustaches. Although, I am impartial to beards with moustaches, but not without moustaches.
I’m weird like that.
Can someone please send me some gauze? I think my brain is leaking out my ear!
Only 72?
Friday, May 4th, 2007I’m thinking that if I was spending eternity in paradise, that I’d want more than just 72 virgins. I’d want an infinite amount of virgins.
Even if I got bored of virgins, I’d probably want to deflower another one every 1000 years or so, just for kicks.
Eventually though, I’d probably start wondering where all the virgins were coming from. I mean, only so many people that die are actually virgins. Maybe God creates new ones in Heaven just for the enjoyment of the righteous?
